(re)configure your NTP server to stop sending Kiss of Death (KoD) responses when we attempt to sync against it and we'll manage to reset the time much earlier in the boot sequence. Or just leave NTP unconfigured and we'll default to pool.ntp.org servers which normally work fine for people.
I swear to god I have looked through that log multiple times. You are a godsend. I will reconfigure the NTP server. Thanks a bunch!